Wanda’s Journal

Pastor Appreciation

In my novel, The Healing Jar, Brad was a pastor, dedicated to preaching God’s Word and helping others. Sara had taken on the role of a pastor’s wife. Can you think of ways these responsibilities are fulfilling as well as stressful?

My husband served 20 years in the ministry, and he had numerous responsibilities during that time. As a pastor’s wife, I did my best to be supportive and helpful to him. Like Richard, I cared about the people who attended our church, and we enjoyed reaching out to those in our congregation with love.

Do you pray often for your pastor, as well as the pastor’s family? What are some things we can do to show love and appreciation of the clergy and their family in the church we attend?

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103 Comments

  1. Attend church services regularly, listen attentively to his sermons. Encourage the Pastor, his wife and family also lift them up in prayer daily.

  2. By praying for your Pastor and his family..by inviting them to dinner and giving him words of encouragement

  3. Pastors around the world and different religion denominations offered the same message of compassion thoughtfulness and the word of God. Our churches and pastors encourage us to have faith and follow the Lord’s commandments. The Amish people have a very strong faith and relies on our Lord.

  4. Treat the Pastor and family like friends. Remember them in ur prayers, talk to them often. I love to bake so frequently drop off baked goodies at the parsonage and living in a farm with a big garden we share the bountiful harvest of fresh vegetables! God is good!

  5. We love our pastor and his family. We make sure to pray for them and help with anything they need. Our pastor is very hard working and always one of the last ones to leave when helping clean up after something at church. He makes it easy to sit under his teachings.

  6. Love your testimony! I too was a Pastor’s wife for 19 years, them an Evangelist’s wife for 19 years, then another Pastor’s wife, almost 5 years, in Nova Scotia, Canada. People can be cruel to the Pastor’s wife & children when his feathers won’t be ruffled! But with God’s help, grace & mercy, He gives the victory & blesses as they serve Him! At 73 & 76 we still desire to know what Hod’s will is & desire to continue to serve The Lord as long as we can. May our Lord continue to bless you & your husband!

  7. We have a wonderful pastor and his wife is a blessing to us all. Invite friends to come hear him preach the gospel. I thank him and let him know how much we appreciate him. Some times it’s the small things we do.

  8. I pray God give my Pastor strength and to send him peace and comfort as well as his wife. I think we can support our Pastor and his family by words of encouragement, showing appreciation for anytime given to us. I am old school and respect goes along way.

  9. My dad was a pastor . He was assistant pastor for 20 years and pastor for 15. He served the same church for 35 until his passing. It was a comfort to know people were praying for our family. We made many friends over the years through his ministry. We pray for our current pastor and his family regularly because we know how important it is.

  10. We have a new Pastor and I thank God! Our church has been growing with younger members and children! I pray for my pastor and his family. I thank him for being an example to new believers!

  11. We pray for our Pastor and his family. We also treat them like family. We invite them to share a meal with us often. We attend church services and focus on his message.

  12. Pray for them, invite them to meals, be there when they are going through difficult times like they are for us. Show them we love them. I always feel God will lead us in the right direction.

  13. Yes I pray daily for our minister and his family. His wife and I are best friends, it is very stressful. If you have never invited them for dinner please do. They love being invited to members homes.

  14. I believe in the power of prayer. I get overwhelmed sometimes, then I remember “God is testing me” to make me Stronger!
    I would love to win one of your cookbooks.
    Thank you for sharing pictures of the beautiful duck and ducklings. Your pond is beautiful also. How relaxing it must be.

  15. Yes I do they need prayers also. One of our pastors love M&M’s so we gave him a huge bag of them. And I sent a gift to his wife.

  16. First of all thank you for all the inspirational novels you have written over the years.

    I think being a pastor’s wife could be very stressful from time to time dealing with the members of the church your husband would be responsible for. I do pray for my priest since there seems to always be some type of friction going on in my church that seems so mean less in the long run. Just telling your pastor that you appreciate him and all he does will be good for you and him/her.

  17. Pray for the pastor and church staff!
    Leave encouraging notes. Positive comments on sermons..,
    Speak of your pastor in positive ways, not put them down.
    I text or email occasionally to our pastor words of encouragement and offer support.
    Be available for chats or helpful task
    In the church.
    Be positive 🤗

  18. Dear Wanda,
    I purchased your book The healing jar and have not read the trilogy yet, but finished the Apple creek announcement. I so love your books that draw us to a simpler, kinder time, living closer to God. I would also love to be entered into your drawing for the Amish cookbook this month.
    I hope your daughter is healing well with each passing day.
    My best to you and your family.
    Allison Delaney

  19. I do pray for my pastor and the teaching pastors and their families in my church weekly. They have so many responsibilities to the church, the church family, and their own families. I believe that praying for them and also getting involved in your church helps out the pastors. Not all responsibilities of the church falls on the pastor. Since we the congregation is the church then we need to be very active in the church.

  20. Yes, I pray for my pastor and his family. My father was a pastor so I know what they go through. They are on call 24/7 and they hear all the problems within the congregation. And as the saying goes ” you can’t please everyone with decisions made” so I saw how hard it was for my dad and even my mom to go through these things.
    We can send cards of encouragement, take them out for dinner, we even gave them one of our time shares to go away for the weekend, just the two of them. We can give extra money to them in appreciation for the way they live their life.

  21. Wanda,
    I think that a pastor’s job can be stressful because parishioners go to their pastors with their problems. Plus, the added stress of running a church and everything that goes with that. Then, there is always the person that complains no matter what the pastor does. It can give our pastors mental illness. That is what forced two of my old pastors to retire early.
    My family prays for our pastor, and her family, everyday. We can ease up on our pastors. Show that we appreciate them by sending them cards, making them gifts or food. Even just saying “Thank you” to them.

    1. I wanted to add that becoming involved in the church helps the pastor, too. I am a Sunday school teacher, and involved in the Prayer Shawl ministry.

  22. Yes praying our pastor and family is a loving way to help them. They are normal folks like us but have been called by God, to the ministry and go through the same trials and tribulations as we do. What a comfort they are to me and to go to church and be feed of the Lord, to help sustain us for the week.
    I’m so thankful your daughter is doing much better, God saved her for a purpose and what an honor that is for others watching her and your family deal with all that comes from having a stroke. It surely will help other families also watching from the outside. Have a blessed day. Keep up your great story telling. Always looking forward to the next book. Can’t wait to read the Letters of Hope. Kimmie

  23. I was a pastor’s wife for 41 years. AS a young child I took piano lessons. AT 10 yrs; of age I started playing the piano for congregational singing and 73 yrs; later I am still playing the piano for congregational singing. my hubby pastored small churches and I loved my God given ability to support him and the congregation. Being a pastor’s wife brings much joy, much prayer, much growth in the Lord, and much forgiveness as it is not always easy, but very fulfilling.

  24. We have a pastor that is a strict Bible preacher no ifs ands or buts. His wife has MS and is confined by a motorized wheelchair. She can’t move her body and speaks in a whisper. He has said she is the most dedicated Christian he has ever known. Our congregation has reached out to help them in any way we can. We have been blessed with both of them.

  25. Your email’s always come at the right time. When I need encouragement or just a reminder of gods love and grace. Thank you for your gift of writing.

    Would love to win your cookbook!

  26. I think we should keep our pastor in our prayers for guidance in making right decisions for his congregation. I am Catholic and I know our priest has many responsibilities just as any pastor does, with these come tough decisions that most definitely need praying about.

  27. We can be there to offer any help they need. Help with things around the church, like cleaning or maintenance.

  28. Oh no I’m currently reading the hope jar and didn’t know who “Sara” had picked but now i do!
    I love your writings, Wanda. What a creative imagination the Lord gave you!
    I will return to remember to pray more for my Pastor. I can’t imagine how much he is probably contacted for prayer and counsel all through the week, and another of people have no idea the burdens he must bear in sympathizing with others and the constant needs he tries to meet.
    My grandma has said how lonesome it would be to be a Pastors wife, because she couldn’t really be too close to others because some might get jealous . I dont know if that’s true. How did you like being a Pastors Wife? I used to want to marry a Pastor when I was little I thought that would be ideal..my husband is not a Pastor but he is a firefighter and now a Chaplain on the fire dept and I see him volunteer and counsel people and it does require a lot of his free time, as well as his thoughts and prayers, some late night texts, etc but he feels called to do it.
    I know Jesus came to serve not to be served, sometimes it’s hard to remember, we are here for that purpose!
    Blessings,
    Rachel Maples
    Missouri

  29. Our dear Pastor just resigned after 25 years. His wife, my dear friend has cancer, and while nothing is impossible for GOD, her outlook isn’t good. She’s stage 4 and it’s spreading.
    My heart breaks because he’s an amazing Pastor, but he’s an equally amazing husband and father. They are making beautiful memories, traveling while she can, and using every available moment.
    I often help her with household chores and make meals for them.i never fail to feel the love of GOD on my own life while honoring theirs.
    I am so happy to see that your daughter is doing better, what praying we’ve done, and continued prayer we’re doing on her behalf. GOD is good all the time.

  30. I see you as a sweet and tenderhearted pastor wife! I do love our Bishop and pray for him and his family. Their service is always so freely given and when I became a widow recently, he was there every step of way. They definitely deserve our prayers and thankfulness to show our appreciation for their selfless time spent on each of us.S

  31. Our Pastor is greatly beloved, he went through cancer and treatments last year. He was healed! We prayed daily for him and his family. The Associate Pastors filled in for him. We held weekly Wed. night meals for everyone to keep our church cohesive.
    Meals were taken to his family and all the decons tried to meet every need that arose to take the weight and responsibility off of his shoulders and his wife. We went through the Left Behind series of films after the meals to demonstrate our need to carry on during his absence. One nine year old girl came to give her life to the Lord because she saw the gospel presented to her during this time.
    When he rang the bell at the local cancer center meaning he had completed his last treatment. They filmed that to show at church and everyone stood and rang a bell during the service to show him we were all involved with his healing.
    I know the Lord blessed us all during this difficult time.

  32. Remembering them in your prayer daily is a good way to help your pastor and their family. Let them know that you remember them in your prayers.

  33. We love and appreciate our pastor and his wife so much. They have such a love for the Lord which is so evident in their lives.
    We pray for them each day and let them know we appreciate them very much.

  34. Our pastor and missionaries say continually the best thing we as a church family can do for them is PRAY.

  35. I am the office administrator in our Lutheran church. I work side by side with our Pastor. She has become a close friend to me. I attend weekly worship services helping in various areas such as usher, reading the scripture of the day, helping serve communion. We have the best pastor!

  36. I pray daily for my pastor and his family. You can send encouraging notes and tell him when a sermon touches you

  37. Wanda thank you for telling us about your favorite season (summer) and your experiences with nature. My favorite season is fall,I love the nip in the air and the fall colors of autumn leaves. I have many of your books .I love the ones about Christmas my favorite holiday.i continue to pray for Lorraine. I’m glad she is making improvements.

  38. Yes I pray for my pastor and his family. Ways to show love are to be at the scheduled services, acknowledge their birthdays and anniversaries. Also, bake them a cake or pie periodically.

  39. We have loved present and all past pastors and their families and keep in touch with many. Also lift them in prayer as well!! They are some of the kindest appreciative people always willing to help!!

  40. Yes, praying is very powerful and praying for our pastor as well as friends and family is one of the most powerful, yet personal things we can do for those who hold a special place in our lives.

  41. A wonderful post to reflect on. I need to do better at praying for my Pastors and their families. One idea to show appreciation for them is to have a cookout at my home this summer just for our Pastors and their families. I do want them to know how much I appreciate all they have done in my life.

  42. In my younger years I stayed with and helped in the churches of several pastors and families. I was always so surprised how much some people “required” of them and the hardships that were suffered because of it. However, it has made me more able and willing to pray for them and support them in ways I might not have if I never had seen first hand what a few church-goers felt they were entitled to from pastors and families. The pastors were always so kind and helpful to everyone. Because of that I was encouraged to depend on Jesus to help me encourage others.

  43. I constantly pray for my pastor and his family and try to take some of the burden off of him.

  44. We can comment and encourage the pastor on his sermons. Take a meal over every once in awhile so they can have a night out. Check in on them… see how they’re emotionally feeling. I mean life is life whether you are a pastor or not. Don’t complain about the church first say where can I help. Prayer…a kind word…appreciation..and even a hug or a good cry.
    Also if you have a retreat/vacation home/airline points share them with them. Give them a reprieve. Everyone needs rest and re-energizing.

  45. It takes a very special person to be a pastors wife. In my own church I sometimes see that our pastors wife sometimes takes on so many burdens even when her world is on tilt. We are very blessed with our entire staff. I always make it a habit to pray for them daily and often.

  46. My brother was a pastor in Chico, CA when they found out his wife had tuberculosis. Needless to say, their plans “WENT AWRY”. She had to spend many months in a TB sanitorium. That left my brother the pastor of a church with not only a congregation, but with five children too. That’s where pastor appreciation took place. His congregation did not want him to resign, so they all pitched in to help with the kids, meal preparation and the needs of his little family. They all became closer to one another and closer in the ways of the lord. It was a blessing to see what God did in that little church and in my brother’s family.

  47. Hi Wanda.
    I pray every night before going to bed. And sometimes I need to say a prayer during the day. I prayer for our Pastor, he is dealing with health issues. He recently became a Grandpa to twin granddaughters, they were born premature.. but growing and healthy…
    I th I nk by going to church and supporting your church and Pastor is a huge help. Give a little extra in the plate if you can sometimes. Get on the council board to help improve/ change things. Help with spring/ fall clean up…
    I pray to keep my family and friends safe and healthy.
    Maybe someday my mother will stop being so crabby and have a relationship with me & my family….

  48. Second only to vigilant praying for our pastors (including the wife and children), is the need to recognize they are human, as are we, and so subject to human needs and wants. Our ministers need time off, which may or may not come when it is convenient to us and our personal schedules. There are times when a person in the congregation may want the pastor specifically to call on them personally; but time away with the family to relax and be refreshed in their fellowship are as important to the health of the pastors as to the church body. So I pray for the protection of their personal time: for study, time to praise, and time to rest and be with their families.

  49. Hi Wanda. I have been a great fan of you, your books, and the love you have for the Amish community. Years ago I began reading your books. Since then Amish fictional is all I read. I have a great love for the Amish. They inspire me to simplify my life, have more faith, and learn to be more forgiving. I’m excited for your future books.
    A few years ago stayed in an Amish rental in Ronks, PA. The sweet Amish couple became my friend, along with some of their children and grandchildren. I have taken my husband and one of my daughters back to their home to meet. We write and call. I plan on visiting Elam and Emma again this fall. Emma is a treasured friend that I am so grateful to have im my life. We don’t share the same lifestyle or religion. But we have so many other things in common and a wonderful time together.
    And it all started because of your books!!! Thank you so very much!

  50. I love to do things for our Pastor and also to the Evangelist that come for Revival. They give so freely of their time and watch over us as a congregation. Most Pastors are available anytime of night and day and that is reason enough to show them they are appreciated.

  51. I am often reminded of our Amish friends, who, when they are chosen for leadership roles in the church, oftentimes do not celebrate that fact (as some English people might do) because they realize what a monumental undertaking it is. Perhaps their wives even weep over the decision. Sometimes, it is a job filled with happiness, but sometimes, it is filled with sadness. It seems like it would carry a heavy burden. Probably the best way anyone could help their pastor is by realizing that he (or she) is person, just like them. As a person, they are prone to making mistakes. Be willing to see your pastor as a human, and give them the grace you would appreicate. Pastors aren’t God. Another way to help them would be to help them out by volunteering in the church. Many hands make light work, as the saying goes.

  52. My family and church family are preparing for Pizza party and ice cream social at our church with good wholesome fellowship where young and old come together and enjoy. Always something to do in God’s work.

  53. I pray for our pastor regularly, and encourage him when I have a chance to speak to him. I often feel he is a part of our family.

  54. The jar series was one of my favorite series. All of your books speak to me and draw me closer to God.

  55. I love your books. I just finished reading 2 of them. When I start reading I can’t put the book down

  56. Thank you for all of your work at making us wonderful books to read and appreciate the Amish life. You are a gift from God.

  57. We just met with our pastor this week to go over plans for my motherinlaws funeral. While we were talking with him my husband shared how much he was encouraged by the direction he is leading our church in. Our pastor felt encouraged by his comment.

  58. It would be fulfilling to be helpful to people in the congregation, who I am sure feel like family to you after a while. I’m sure it would also be very stressful to juggle home life and pastor duties, as well as separating the two. Pastors are many times expected to be on duty 24 hours a day, but I’m sure their immediate family expects that also. Sometimes something small like a card on Pastor Appreciation Day can mean a LOT! I know I need to pray more often for our pastor. Thank you for the reminder!

  59. Thank you for the reminder. I don’t pray for my pastor and his family as often as I should. I will truly make an effort to do better.

  60. Shower your Pastor with praise and good wishes. Make a dinner for the family.
    Listen attentively in church, let him know you are really listening!

  61. In my view all nurturing professions carry gratifying yet huge responsibilities. Clergy and their family members top the chart in regards to nurturing professions. I believe one thing we can all do to show love and appreciation is to remember these individuals deserve some privacy. It is true that clergy and their loved ones know and accept their huge responsibilities when the profession of ministry is entered ,however; it is only respectful to be mindful for need for family and private times. After all these individuals are all human and deserve the same things we all seek. Thank you for the opportunity to win this cookbook

  62. I currently do not have a local pastor. We do pray for the pastor of my old church that helped in saving our marriage. We live in a small community now bit the choice of churches is slim.

  63. I feel being a pastor is a very demanding job on them and their spouse and the family. I keep mine in my prayers as he leads our church. It takes a special person to be a

  64. Ring a pastors wife and a pastor is not only a lonesome calling, but sheep can bite hard! Good thing a calling is more than a job! Prayer for them and offer help!

  65. I think the biggest way we can show our love and appreciation is by being good faithful people, by helping those around us and always showing our appreciation.

  66. Sending a note to the pastor letting him know you support and appreciate him and his family. Making note of the times he has boldly preached the truth of God’s word boldly from the pulpit! Pray for him, by name, and his family for standing firm upon God’s word during the turbulent times.

  67. I can pray for my pastors and the ministry of our church. I say thank you when I see them.

  68. My husband is one of the pastors at my church. I appreciate the support and prayers of others.

  69. My Stepdad is a minister so I understand how being a pastor’s wife and family can be such a blessing and a little stressful. People tend to expect more out of you and don’t always treat you the same. But I am blessed to have him as my dad and am so happy to be apart of a God fearing and God loving family.

  70. I love your books. and love your journal entry on the Healing Jar. My grandma years ago wanted to fix me up with her Pastor who was single. I see him now and he is still single and is 90 years old. I do pray for my Pastor and family. She is a good Pastor and her husband and son lead the worship singing. She is a very busy person involved in the community.

  71. I think wonderful ways to support my pastor and his family are to pray for them, let him know I enjoyed his sermons, offer to do errands that might be helpful for the family, or invite them to a meal or bring a meal or dessert to them. It feels good to do something nice for others and it is appreciated by the pastor and his family too.

  72. It is so important to let our spiritual leaders know we appreciate all they do for their congregations.
    For those who can not be involved in church activities, regular service attendance and
    a sincere thank-you will help.

  73. I always pray for my pastor and his wife. My dad was my pastor while I was growing up but isn’t now, and many of my friends were pastors kids so I know the importance of those prayers and believe fully in the power of them.

  74. I can see now how your writings come from, your ministry with your husband and the love of God has given you a great gift. I’ve never been a reader because I always had a hard time concentrating but after I read one of your books and couldn’t put them down. I have read almost all of your books and love them. Your stories have grown my faith and helped me through tough times.

    Thank you for all the inspiration you give to me and to all your readers.

  75. I think it would be very hard to be a pastor’s wife . it definitely would be stressful and take a lot of praying .

  76. Keep all pastoral staff covered in prayer,pray that the Lord gives them wisdom and spiritual insight on how to lead the church,attend services,let them know how much you care
    and appreciate them and thier families for everything that they do.

  77. My father is a pastor, so I’ve seen the good, the bad and the ugly, but we were blessed to be in more churches where we saw the good. As a result, now that I’ve moved away, I try to be helpful and encouraging to my pastor and we often invite him to do things and share holidays with our family as he is alone. I set aside time every Thursday as my day for concentrated prayer for my pastor.

  78. There are many ways to show our clergy love and appreciation. We can show support to our clergy by attending service and sharing our love of Christ with others. We can volunteer and be there to assist in any way. We can also give our tithe.

  79. The pastor always has a hard job. Encourage him and pray daily for him and his family. Have him and his family over for dinner or deliver dinner to them.

  80. I was given a gift card at my work for $100.00. I felt I had received for doing the job they paid me to do. So as the pastor was greeting everyone after the service. I placed the card in his hand and ask he do something special for himself and his family. I try to always remember the pastor and family in my prayers

  81. I too am a Pastor’s wife. It is a joyful but sometimes stressful position. As a Pastor’s wife you are expected to do everything, especially in smaller churches. Often taken for granted. My husband has retired now and we are privileged to sit under the preaching of a good Pastor. We support him in every way possible and his wife, who is very sweet. Prayer is the biggest and best support we can give.

  82. My husband and I pray for our sweet Pastor and his very supportive wife and I try to remind people constantly to pray daily for them. A Pastor’s load is heavy